Finding a Care Home 

 

Finding the right care home is about more than location or cost. It’s about safety, dignity, and ensuring your loved one is truly cared for. Be prepared to advocate relentlessly, ask the hard questions, and trust your instincts, because even in professional settings, care can fall short. Your voice matters, and your loved one’s wellbeing depends on it. This chapter shares our experiences and advice to help you navigate this challenging journey.

Our journey navigating the care home options

Finding a care home became the next necessary step. In hindsight - because alas hindsight is a wonderful thing, we really should have moved her to a care home sooner, despite what Social Services and the Hospital Discharge Teams had said.  

 

As there are so many care homes within the UK you would think finding one would have been a lot simpler, but this was not an easy task at all: over 50 care homes were called (some with multiple phone calls) four care homes were visited before we found the right place and one that would be able to take her and meet her needs. Many of the care homes called could not meet her needs or did not want to take her due to her being at high risk of falls and they already had a number of people in their care in this category.

 

When we had asked the hospital what kind of care home Grandma needed we were told she needed a care home that could offer EMI and nursing. For those that don't know because I certainly did not at the time of being told an EMI care home (or unit within a care home) is a specialised facility that provides 24-hour nursing and care for individuals with advanced dementia who may have challenging behaviours and require a secure environment. EMI stands for Elderly Mentally Infirm and these homes should offer staff with specialist training, round-the-clock supervision, and support to ensure the safety and well-being of residents with complex needs related to dementia. 

It wasn’t just about location or cost it was about safety, dignity, and knowing she would be properly cared for. 

 

A nursing care home provides 24/7 care with qualified nurses for individuals with complex or long-term health conditions that cannot be managed at home but don't require hospitalisation. In addition to accommodation, meals, and personal care provided in a residential care home, a nursing home offers ongoing medical supervision and treatment from a team of registered nurses who monitor conditions, administer medication, and provide specialised care. 

 

Throughout the numerous calls what was interesting and frustrating to learn was that different care homes viewed nursing care and dementia care differently. Grandma was also rejected from homes as many would say they are full, already had a number of high risk fallers and did not want to take on further high risk fallers as they did not have the carers available in the homes to be able to deal with this.

 

The challenges of finding the right care home

We faced several significant challenges in our search for the perfect care home for Grandma. Here’s what we learned and what you should be aware of:

  • Limited Options: Many care homes either wouldn’t accept her due to a high risk of falls or didn’t take dementia patients at all and or depending on if it was an EMI or nursing care home. Over 50 calls to separate care homes (sometimes multiple calls to individual care homes) as well as visits were needed before finding the right one.
  • Assessing Safety and Care Quality: It was difficult to know which homes genuinely offered safe, compassionate, and competent care. Whilst CQC ratings and reviews should help support make a decision they are not always reliable.
  • Emotional Strain: Visiting multiple homes, seeing incidents of poor care, and worrying about Grandma’s wellbeing was exhausting and emotionally draining.
  • Unexpected Issues: Even after choosing a home and thinking yes we've done it we have found the right one... hospital visits, injuries, and safeguarding issues arose, highlighting that no home is perfect.

Advice for finding a care home

Based on our experiences, here's some crucial advice for navigating the care home search:

  • Trust Your Instincts: If something feels wrong, it probably is. Don’t ignore red flags.
  • Ask Hard Questions: About staffing, incidents, safeguarding, and daily routines - don’t be afraid to push for specifics.
  • Visit Multiple Times: Observe during different times of the day, including meals and activity periods.
  • Document Everything: Keep notes, videos, or photos if needed to advocate for your loved one.
  • Advocate Relentlessly: Be prepared to speak up and intervene - your loved one may not be able to voice concerns themselves.

Support and information that would have helped

Reflecting on our journey, here’s the support and information that would have made the care home transition easier:

  • Clear Guidance on Care Home Options: A trusted resource outlining which homes accept dementia patients and high-fall-risk individuals would have saved time and reduced stress.
  • Detailed Reviews and Transparency: Honest feedback from families about care quality, staff attentiveness, and incident history helps make informed decisions.
  • Speak to Care Homes Directly: Even if a home rejects your loved one, many staff are full of knowledge and willing to offer advice. Don’t be afraid to ask questions it can provide insight and guidance for your next steps.
  • Transition Planning Advice: Step-by-step guidance on moving from home to care, including managing belongings, care plans, financial options (as these are not always clear especially when navigating it all for the first time) and emotional preparation for both family and the resident.
  • Advocacy Tips: Practical advice on what to ask staff, how to monitor care, and ways to ensure your loved one’s safety and dignity are upheld.
  • Emotional Support: Connecting with others who have gone through the same process; to share experiences, frustrations, and coping strategies this would have been invaluable.

Share your story

Have you navigated the challenges of finding a care home? Share your experiences and help others on this difficult journey. Your insights can make a real difference.